One thing that we take for granted is the present that is right in front of us. Life is a beautiful gift. No one can travel back to the past, but it always builds a foundation for your present and future. So instead of fretting about what future holds, can we not repair the leaks of the present? Same goes for our relationships, especially with our partners. The seed of love has been sown in the past, all you need to do is continuously water it for steady growth. There are numerous instances and excuses where we could unknowingly ignore the needs of our partner. And the same can happen to us. It is sometimes not the lack of communication but the lack of action. When in a relationship, always remember that the love you have between you two is not a noun but a verb. You have to do it daily, even when the gesture is the smallest yet comforting.
What comforts us the most? Some level of security in a relationship. This helps us to feel better and confident in many parts of our lives. The people close to us mostly have the spare key to our heart. Sometimes there is love in between the couple, but the spark is waning somehow. There are a few things we can do which we will cover in the rest of the article. But when things really go south and there are things you cannot repair superficially, then you need deep couple therapy. IMBT has the best Couples Therapist In London.
Here are the things you can do to quick fix the problem:
1. Identify your problem first
Is the problem lack of communication? Is the problem lack of action? Or is it both? There are many things that can happen. And sometimes, the relationship can lack the spice! Sometimes you need to try something new to progress the relationship. But first, you need to identify where the problem lies. If you cannot pinpoint to any specific problem then you can talk to a couple therapist.
2. List out the things you like and love about each other
It can consist of their personality traits they have been steady with. It could be anything good about them. Then it can also contain the things that made you fall for them in the first place, that made you say they are the ones you are looking for and will continue to be in love with them. Whenever in doubt, re-read them.
3. Make a list of things you would want to improve and how
If the thing that is lacking is communication, you both will have to take time out from your busy schedule to talk to each other every day. Do not neglect the power of communication. It will help you to build a better understanding of each other. No matter how close or far you both live, make some time in each other’s life. Of course, keeping self, work, and other things are a priority, but remember, you also have a partner added to the joy ride. Make sure you don’t leave them out and keep them waiting.
4. Try out new things
Well, sometimes it is that life can be stuck in a rut. Monotony is not always boring, but reassuring too. No one really hates monotony; they hate what they are doing. If you do things what you love, monotony will never become an issue. You can always have something new in the schedules you have. If you and your partner go out every week, then try different activities. Monotony is a necessary evil, else we lose on the structure. But it never has to be boring.
5. Try to do more of the things that you both enjoy
Try to know what your partner likes and commit yourself in doing that at least once in a week. If you are unsure, just ask them. Plan out the things they like doing or having, then make sure you add that to your “to-do” list. Your partner is your priority too.
6. When the other bad things have taken precedence over the love
There are certain bad things that can make us lose spark over time. It doesn’t have to be simple things, but complicated and hurting ones like cheating on your partner, being abusive, etc. These things need healing. Talk to a couple therapist to progress in the right direction. Get the best couple therapist in London at IMBT.
One thing that we often neglect while loving our partners is self-love. Sometimes we get too needy, too possessive and in turn, it makes us look like the bad person. There is some level of trust and security each person should have in them so that they do not fall apart when the foundation shakes a little. Love your partner and yourself equally. So make sure you only give the best form of love to self and to your partner. Do not neglect both.
These are the things you can do to fix things in your relationship and ignite the spark. Some problems can be fixed quickly with a smile and small effort, and some needs time. But always make sure you are doing the right thing so that the relationship sails in the right direction. If you are confused and too heartbroken to understand and implement these things in your life and relationship, then get an appointment with a relationship therapist. You can book an appointment at IMBT to get counselling with the best couple therapist in London.
Visit www.imbt.co.uk to know more.